Hey guys! It still really hasn’t occurred to me that I am 21. Like every time someone asks me how old I am, I tend to miscalculate my age because I am not really used to being it. I mean, I’m 8 months into my official ‘adult’ life and there’s still some stuff I haven’t figured out yet and maybe that’s one of the reasons why I don’t always feel ~adult~ enough.
How does one person get over someone? Honestly, I don’t know. I’m not even here to talk about it. CLICKBAIT!!!!! Anyway, please don’t report me and, since you’re already here, just continue reading. Okay, here goes.
August is always an even-filled month in Cebu every year. Aside from the usual celebrations like the Lechon Festival, Cebu also hosts events that, not only showcases its food and culture but also its geographical location. Such event that requires this is always the much anticipated annual event, the IronMan Race.
Hey there! If you have been following me (which you should), you should know by now that I just finished doing all school work and am now just waiting to sashay on that graduation stage. All those school work really put a lot on my plate over the last two months and all I can say is they’re worth it. Whatever sacrifices I’ve made and time I’ve spent have sure flourished their worth. I’ll just be very straight when I say that the degree I’m in isn’t what I always wanted but it is a living proof that you will get something once you put your heart [and mind and body and soul and some coinz and probably sacrifice a goat] into it.
Well… how do you even begin to explain something you don’t understand? It’s like your teacher let you recite what she discussed when you arrived late. Maybe I’m just too you or too dumb or too inexperienced. Maybe I needed more time – time to learn, grow, and understand all things that I needed to. Maybe I was playing when I said that I’m ready to face life being 21 and officially being an adult. Man, it’s hard. It always reminds me of that one post I saw online saying that being 18-24 is like playing an RPG about survival and you skipped Tutorial Mode. Guess I’m a fool.
In the land of Gods and Monsters, I was an angel living in the garden of evil
Lana Del Rey opens her song with much conviction that she needed to survive a world filled with many evils ruled by monsters and patriarchs who see themselves higher than anyone else. She was an angel. She was the light. She was herself.
In a land where many conservatives hail – where people choose to conform to out-dated norms – I was a rebel. I was a visionary. I am a surfer against the tides. I am me.
I was such a lost kid who was just trying to adjust and, at least, felt the need to belong to the city about 5 years ago. It was a long agonizing period in my life where I didn’t know just what to do yet. Did I have the need to just study? Did I feel the need to try new things? Did I feel the need to change myself in order to fit in? Did I feel the need to do what I love?
Yes. I did. Not all simultaneously but that long and agonizing period made me ask so many questions – too much emotions and thoughts bouncing within the lobes of my brain and back just waiting to find release. It was such a crisis that tormented me. But something good came out of it; whatever I felt during that time pushed me to do something I didn’t know was going to change my life. I decided to go back to what I love to do – what has always been there but got neglected: I wanted to write. Thank God for technology that I got through all that struggle in order to find myself.
I wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote ‘til it was just free-falling. It was losing a sense of direction. I didn’t know where it was going. There was a voice that kept on telling me that I could do better.
Stevie Nicks didn’t really find her voice until she joined Fleetwood Mac. She used to be just a free-flying bird but when she joined the band, they created magic together releasing one of the best albums in all of history.
Like Stevie, I was looking for my tribe.
That was when Cebu Bloggers Society walked into the picture.
I don’t even know how to begin explaining the feeling when I got in. I didn’t feel like what I do with my writing was worthy of getting me that coveted membership slot – that some boy from the outskirts of the south like me could be in such an industry. But I was happy. This is my Fleetwood Mac.